If you grew up with a dad who was not present (physically, mentally, or emotionally), the void of love & attention you craved possibly made you overly available as an adult, constantly seeking validation and fearing rejection. But guess what? This people-pleasing habit can backfire, leaving you drained, resentful, and unable to set healthy boundaries.
Here’s the deal:
- The Craving Trap: When your childhood lacked consistent love, you might develop a deep desire for it in adult relationships. This can make you prioritize others’ needs, even if it means neglecting your own.
- The “No” Monster: Saying no can feel terrifying, like you’re risking the love you desperately crave. This can lead to overextension, burnout, and resentment towards those you actually care about.
- The Boundary Blur: Without clear boundaries, your personal space and energy get trampled on. You end up feeling like everyone else’s responsibility, unable to prioritize your own needs and desires.
But hey, there’s good news! You can break free from this cycle and reclaim your time, energy, and well-being. Here’s how:
1. Recognize the Pattern: Start by realizing how your childhood experiences might be impacting your current relationships. Notice when you struggle to say no, feel responsible for everyone’s happiness, or prioritize others over yourself.
2. Reframe Rejection: Remember, saying no isn’t rejecting someone, it’s simply respecting your own needs and limitations. True friends and loved ones will understand and respect your boundaries.
3. Practice Makes Perfect: Start small! Saying no to a small request can feel empowering. Practice with low-stakes situations to build confidence.
4. Set Boundaries: Think of boundaries like protective fences. They allow healthy connections to flourish while keeping out what drains you. Set clear boundaries in your relationships, starting with things that feel essential.
5. Self-Love is Key: You can’t pour from an empty cup! Prioritize self-care, set aside time for hobbies & activities you enjoy, and learn to say yes to yourself just as readily as you say yes to others.
Remember, this journey is about finding balance. It’s about learning to love yourself just as much as you crave love from others.
And guess what? When you truly respect your own needs and boundaries, you attract healthier, more respectful relationships in the long run. 
So go out there, set those boundaries, and reclaim your power! You deserve it!